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cyber-corp · 1 year ago

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A """summary""" of Homestuck: Act 6 Part 1

by someone who's glad they've gone back to basics for a bit

Let's (for a brief, fleeting moment) start again nice and simple.

It is the 11th of November, 2011 and today a young girl named Jane Crocker is excited to play the alpha for a game that comes out today called SBURB. How fun!

Jane here is heiress to Betty Crocker's baked goods empire (as mentioned previously in Nannasprite's story), and there is also set to be a major rebranding initiative happening today as well. She likes baking, detective stories, as well as the occasional jape.

But look out! There's another guy! His name is Jake English, and he's quite fond of action-adventure flicks, guns, and blue alien chicks. Fucking freak he is.

Jake is currently helping/pestering Jade, his ectodaughter/dead grandma who is set to give it to John (Jake's relations with him is yet to be revealed), before realising that it'll need a bit of uranium to be finished. He only can get it through a boy called Dirk Strider, (unfortunately), and his Brobot which just so happens to be the only source of uranium on the island that Jake lives on.

Before he pesters Dirk, Jake gets a message from someone (presumably a troll) named UU. They essentially tell him "hey!!! go for it!! i believe in yoU!!! also this event is extremely important timeline-wise, so dont screw it Up!!!!"

Jake attempts to get to Dirk about uranium, only to get the equivalent of an AI-based answering machine, much to his dismay.

He then heads out of the island's forest (with the dread of the Brobot lingering) and into the open. He witnesses the beautiful fauna on display.

Too beautiful for comfort.

Jake attempts a getaway, before being swarmed by a large swarm of fairy bulls! Whatever shall he do now? But not to worry, because a certain BrotherRobot has come to rescue!

He then immediately gets his ass kicked royally, (complete with Tensei's amazing score) and blacks out. He has a dream about someone who kinda looks like Vriska???? But isn't really??? Maybe it's one of the prophecy people that Doc Scratch was talking about??? Or undead Vriska??? idk man.....

He tells Roxy Lalonde about this, who panics because everyone in the group is attracted to Jake in some way. He is a harem protag, apparently.

Anyway, while Jane has the most relatable moment in all of Homestuck by awkwardly confirming her and Jake's 'friendship', Brobot tears out its own heart, then blows itself up, giving Jake the uranium he needs. He also confesses to Jane that he and Dirk would be a good couple!!!!

The Alpha Gang have proved themselves to be superior to the Beta Gang by being gay.

Jake is last seen in this chapter heading down the frog temple, presumably to finally send that package.

Where was I? Oh yeah, Jane!

So CrockerCorp undergoes its big rebranding, changing its symbol to a fork instead of a spoon, which will have very big implications later on.

After UU pesters her about the nature of the game she will play, she continues to look out the window, to no game yet in her mailbox.

While pestering a ditzy girl named Roxy Lalonde, she just so happens to notice that her mailbox flappy thing is up, meaning the game is finally here! She dons a shitty disguise to confuse her dad (which is the same as John's dad), and, with the help of Dirk's robot bunny Lil Seb creating a massive hole in the wall, she lass scampers out of there.

She opens the mailbox, which then proceeds to fucking explode, knocking her out and sending her to Prospit, where Jack Noir ᶠᵘᶜᵏᶦⁿᵍ ᵏᶦˡˡˢ ʰᵉʳ ᵍᵒᵈᵈᵃᵐᵐᶦᵗ before she wakes up.

I think at this point I am completely past the point of no return and have no choice but to cosplay as Gamzee with nothing but grey Sharpie. Other than that, Homestuck continues to keep itself fresh and interesting through established lore (probably from a page you don't even remember because you were too distracted by Karkat yelling).

Even more excited to see where this goes!

#jane crocker #jake english #jack noir #homestuck #alpha kids #roxy lalonde #dirk strider #gecko boy #gecko boy reads homestuck #also guy fieri could smash the supreme court no contest

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incorrect-ikevamp-quotes · 2 years ago

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Comte’s Drama CD: Track One, Prologue

Since I got the Comte drama CD and there’s nobody around to stop me from inflicting that on everyone else, it’s time.

The premise of the entire recording is that MC and Comte spend a day together, so it’s basically Comte non-stop simping for nearly an hour. As you can imagine, I had an excellent time and I hope you will too.

I will say I did enjoy a few of the tracks more than others, only because he’s the most dramatic man alive and I love him. His head is empty and he’s the only one for me!!! More seriously though, there are also a lot of sweet moments that really speak to how vulnerable and real he is with her--and I’m always really drawn to that duality in him. Yes we all mask the true nature of who we are to a degree, but I think there is something to be said for the effort he makes to be honest with her; especially considering how deeply rooted that instinct to conceal is for him.

Without further ado, I will go through each track with little snippets of actual dialogue in the CD. Please note again, I am by no means a professional or a perfect translator; I’m just too obsessed to be stopped.

The rest is under the cut to avoid spoilers, also because it’s long meta/squealing fest:

So the first track is called “Prologue” and as you can imagine it is exactly as it sounds. There really isn’t a whole lot to this one, as he basically recaps all the things we learn in his main story route. I do want to comment mostly on the beginning and the end of it though, since it’s exceedingly cute and makes me want to kiss him.

His spoken lines at the beginning are as follows:

So this is where you were. Were you looking at the moon from the balcony?

…Indeed, it’s true. It’s hard not to be captivated by such a beautiful crescent moon.

Usually it would be time to go to bed, but it’s such a lovely moonlit night. Let’s stay up a little late tonight.

We could have a glass of wine, or play a game? What would you prefer?

...huh? You want me to tell you a story?

Like. There are so many moving parts here, I don’t even know where to begin. The fact that he’s always seeking her presence (this can easily be corroborated by dozens of event stories). The way that he’s also drawn to the moon, the little silence there speaks to his thoughtfulness and musings of his own that are unknown to us. What does it evoke for him? Is he, too, reminded of the night they first met (hoping MC is thinking of the same)? Can you tell the thought alone is killing me?

The fact that he wants to spend that time with her, lingering beside her and unwilling to part. The way he always gives her a choice, always wants to know what she wants too. The audible surprise when he’s like ????? Storytime? And mind you I don’t think it’s because he thinks it’s immature, rather that he wasn’t expecting it. In a life surrounded by people--both purebloods and humans alike--that are entertained by so little, it’s heart-warming to be with someone who looks for something deeper, something closer to the soul. That, in a way, she’s asking for the gifts of his mind and voice, two things entirely unique to him.

I weep.

He goes on to say:

(his laughter SOBS) That’s a very sweet request…not at all, of course I don’t mind.

I am neither a playwright, nor a novelist. I don’t know if I can tell a good story.

I hope I can fulfill my princess’ expectations.

…Hm, what should I talk about?

Well then…what about a man who lives forever?

So many things going on here, and no I will not remove my commentary because it’s essential to recreating the experience for the poor souls who will never hear the majesty of his seiyuu’s acting. Truly Horie-san exists to bring Comte to life and I hope he knows I owe him a blood debt.

ANYWHO so like. The way he’s delighted to indulge her (screaming and crying and throwing up why is he so cute??????). But not only that, the self-conscious bent of how he says “I don’t know if I can tell a good story.” I feel like it’s easy to forget that Comte is very much the type of person who prefers to blend into the background; he doesn’t seem to like or be in the habit of drawing a great deal of attention. He likes MC’s attention but I think that’s not really comparable, he’s very specific about who he shares himself with/seeks attention from.

Also I will say. I’ve never really been the type to like the term of endearment “princess” (he literally says hime in the CD) but. Because it is Comte and his adorable face that I want to squish between my hands, I will allow it. He’s a silly goose and he’s more than enough, I love him sm.

Following that he goes into his life up to that point, and because a lot of it is a bit repetitive I might leave bits and pieces out. I do want to highlight a few lines--mostly because they give insight into his character construction that might not have been as obvious in the main story.

A long time ago, so far away that even memories can grow dim…a man was born into a certain aristocratic family.

The family had a great secret. They weren’t human--they were pureblood vampires.

A person who was born with the promise of eternal life.

A person who had the capacity to pursue every pleasure in this world forever.

…But there are always two sides to everything.

…The endless life was, in other words, a prison made of time.

To have met and parted countless times with his loved ones,

The man’s chest ached with loneliness, overwrought by the emptiness.

He had no choice but to watch the world pass him by in endless hours.

I think there is. Something so haunted and fascinating in the words “But there are always two sides to everything.” Even more so because in his literal main story, he openly says “The brighter the light, the deeper the shadows”; always returning to this idea that all things in life are dual in nature. For all that you see one quality, the opposite exists as well. Interesting too because I feel like it explains a lot of his deep-seated anxieties about waiting for the other shoe to drop. Where love exists, loss exists as well. Where joy exists, so does pain. Where fulfillment is possible, so is emptiness. I think it makes a lot of sense that, when you live in an endless expanse of time, perhaps the scariest aspect of it is the constant fluctuation and change. Life is fun when things are going well, but what happens when the painful parts stretch so long? How do you cope?

Just things that keep me up at night yk.

I also think it’s fascinating the way he speaks about his immortality. In Leonardo, we see him address it as something that is monstrous and unnatural. He feels it is an abomination, something to be rectified or removed, almost. Comte doesn’t seem to share that view entirely. He says “He had no choice but to watch the world pass him by.” The removal of agency here is something that I want to highlight. Leonardo sees immortality and his identity as something that has to be reviled; there is a self-retaliatory nature to it in my view. Since he can’t fight against it, he fights against himself. Comte’s words speak more to dissociative terror; to force disconnection from your own body/mind because the pain of your entrapment or the threat to your life is so great. And tbh it’s brilliantly tied back to his lifestyle.

Comte uses the repercussions of his trauma two-fold. To seek out parties and novelties on one level expertly cloaks him in the mien of someone who is a devil-may-care product of overwhelmingly sustained privilege. But on another, I think it’s reasonable to argue that he seeks these things out with two other motives in mind; protection and grounding. He openly tells MC that his greater motive in attending parties is to seek out information to understand who to support on the world stage. This tells us that he does operate on a political level, if only to ensure the safety of his family--but I suspect it is also his way of moving the tides of fate around him in more benevolent directions. Furthermore, keeping himself engaged in something ensures that he is not left alone with his thoughts for too long and keeps him rooted in the present moment, something he also admits to struggling with. (And is a core feature of more extreme dissociation, the endless struggle to live in the present moment.)

I suppose I’m just incredibly interested in the way Leonardo regards himself with such self-hatred and revulsion, where Comte just seems so…removed. Not that Comte is empty of self-contempt, only that it does not feel quite as charged as Leonardo’s. I guess for me it more evokes the image of a child locking himself in a secret hideaway. Where Leonardo lashes out, Comte is the opposite; he retreats/hides. The only time he chooses to fight is when he’s protecting someone else (screams and cries, pls don’t get me started on his righteous fury I could go on for years, every time I remember Jeanne’s rt I’m 👌🏼 close to sobbing).

I also still don’t know how to reconcile the fact that his room is deadass filled with hourglasses (bruh), yet he says “…The endless life was, in other words, a prison made of time.” Like. Something something is his room considered the prison made of time ????? Because if that’s the case my god I’m throwing them all out. Then again it could be his attempt at controlling that which he fears, which I can respect considering I too delude myself into thinking I can control shit I can’t to face the impossibilities of the universe…

After that, Comte starts to explain the agreement he and Vlad made. Honestly it really is a summary for the most part, but there is a section I find worth discussing:

They wanted to create a person who would not die, and would continue to shine with their unique talents.

Without realizing how arrogant it was, they tried to find meaning in this life lived forever.

But…it didn’t go well.

Until there was a sizable rift between the old friends--and they parted ways.

They both loved humans, and worried about their future…they should have felt the same way.

…regardless, all that was left was a door that could cross time and space freely.

What I find interesting about all this is how Comte processes the conflict that transpired between them. Granted there is always the possibility that he’s not addressing everything he’s feeling (the man is REPRESSED) but there’s something that stands out to me when he says “they should have felt the same way.” I feel like when people have a fight with someone they tend to be pretty preoccupied that the other side was wrong; Vlad certainly is desperate to prove he was in the “right.” Comte doesn’t seem interested in that at all. He seems more confused, as if he simply doesn’t understand who Vlad is anymore. Like he doesn’t recognize the person who once cherished human life as much as he did (which I do have some contention with; I’m really not sure Vlad ever did love humanity the way Comte did. Perhaps Comte had believed it was so because he so deeply wished to have friend to comfort and understand him in his pain). I don’t think it’s that Vlad isn’t capable of caring about humans, more that--following the massacre of his clan at the very least--he has too great an interest in retaliation to be able to interact with them without power abuse happening.

I do say this fully understanding that Vlad probably saw some fked up shit, I’m just saying objectively the man sees humanity in an adversarial lens, an oppositional force. Comte tends to be more neutral/positive; he’s more interested in working to a common goal and identifies more closely with them psychologically speaking.

I also find it interesting he says their goal was “arrogant.” Recently I’ve been thinking about the complexities of arrogance. I think it can be easy to oversimplify it as shallow motives that are only focused on self-aggrandizement, but I think it can develop in even more complex situations--often with the best of intentions. I think Comte is trying to say that, while they wanted to preserve lives that were inspiring and uplifting to others, there is folly in the idea that only a few people can manage that.

People and life in general are multi-faceted things; so many influences and variables act upon them. It is more sustainable to be a single unit of immovable, radical mindfulness and extend that outwards. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with people working together to achieve that goal, only that the responsibility for changing the world can’t fall on a handful of shoulders. It requires everyone to care and think more critically about their behavior, with the help of the people around them (ideally). There is arrogance in the belief that they had control over the fate of the world--an arrogance Vlad will not relinquish, one that continues to get him into trouble and lost him his oldest friend.

Aight and because that’s enough of my brainworms, this track ends with:

And the door brought another important encounter…that’s you. :>

Now, you know what I mean, don’t you? That’s right…that’s the story until you and I met each other in our destiny.

But that was only the beginning…now, we move forward together.

Our very sweet, and happy love story.

I just…………like I know I say it over and over again, but the way he just fills me to bursting with uwus. Another important encounter, a life-changing one for him…that a new story is being written, one that they get to write together. That “we move forward together” in a “very sweet, and happy love story.” It’s nearly like a fairy tale but somehow it doesn’t feel contrived or hokey when he says it, it just fills me with warmth. I think I just love that, for all his initial hesitations, he really doesn’t waver when he’s decided on something he wants. And if MC is willing to bet on him, he’s ready to up the ante.

All right well that about sums up track 1, next one to come is track 2! Enjoy these musings until then~

#ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp comte #ikevamp saint germain #ikevamp meta #ikevamp drama cd #fangdad propaganda #oh yeah and some leonardo meta if you squint #ikevamp leonardo #honestly i'd like to thank cybird for giving me a hundred more reasons to love comte #it's not like i necessarily needed more fuel but by god do i go feral #especially since he gets a bit more monopolizing as the event stories go on #MMMMMM BOY I DIE #god and kazuma horie..........#the way he is just so good at the 'hahahahaha court jester aristocrat' to 'baby girl/panty smashing ho'#the man sends me to the stratosphere i sincerely can't imagine comte with any other voice at this point #when he laughs im just 'i need a moment' **bawls my eyes out**#truly a man who understood his assignment #that being said stay tuned for the other six tracks #ya girl is off to take a nap #being comte's simp is a full time job and i am dedicated

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